


now i think i'll get through the end of the world

by love_killed_the_superstar



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Dreamscapes, Dreamsharing, Gen, Lucid Dreaming, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Sickfic, The Spirit Morph Saga
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-03
Updated: 2019-01-03
Packaged: 2019-10-03 15:24:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,343
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17286587
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/love_killed_the_superstar/pseuds/love_killed_the_superstar
Summary: “I have no idea how you can be so chipper about all of this.”“It's a leo thing.”Connie cracked a wry smile.“Definitely not because nothing about the gems surprises you anymore.”“Of course not.”(Secret Santa gift for Mundovore. My own personal take on the 'how Connie reacted to the PD reveal' situation.)





	now i think i'll get through the end of the world

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Mundivore](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mundivore/gifts).



> Happy 2019! I took part in the Cluster's Secret Santa fic exchange this year and barely made the deadline, but here we are!  
> There was a mysterious connverse-shaped hole in the Reunited arc where we never got to see Connie's reaction to the PD reveal. So I thought I'd give it a go!

_ “Connie, Mom was Pink Diamond.” _

_ “...Oh, wow.” _

 

…

 

Steven was on a mission.

Lion was easy enough to locate, hiding out in his usual spot under the house that he liked to use as cover from the rain. With the bribe of a lion licker and the explanation of needing to see Connie, Lion shook his mane free of rain and allowed Steven to climb aboard. He'd already left a note on the kitchen table explaining to Ruby and Sapphire that he was heading out to see Connie, and that there would be plenty of time to discuss every aspect of the wedding in excruciating detail once he got back.

With a roar, Lion beamed them into Connie's neighborhood, where it was also drizzling, the remnants of a storm still weighing down the air around him. After giving him a sodden hug that Lion seemed only mildly inconvenienced by, Steven wiped his palms on his jeans and marched up to the front door of the Maheswaran residence, fully determined to air out his feelings about Connie refusing to answer his calls ever since he broke the latest news in 'The Unfortunate Family History of Steven Diamond (Formerly Quartz) Universe (Formerly DeMayo)’.

It was no wonder he was on the brink of an identity crisis.

Before he even had the chance to knock, however, the door swung open and Connie's mother tensed up in surprise as she laid eyes on him.

“Oh, Steven!” Priyanka seemed... not quite as displeased to see him as usual, and stepped aside for him to enter the house. “Is everything all right?”

“Um... yeah?”

“It's just, Connie mentioned that things were a little tense at home...” Priyanka deliberated on what to say next. “I know I don't understand many things about your unconventional home life. But these things will come to pass. Probably.”

Steven blinked, touched at her words, although he doubted finding out that Rose Quartz was Pink Diamond would come to pass as easily as Priyanka assumed. Then again, without context, it probably just seemed like a normal family disagreement.

“Oh. Thank you, Mrs Maheswaran.”

She nodded, a little stiffly. “You're welcome.”

She straightened the collar on her doctor's coat and Steven frowned.

“Are you going to the hospital?”

“Yes,” she sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. “Doctor Stromberg has called in sick again, of course he has, so my shift is starting earlier than I'd hoped.” She paused. “Steven, would you be able to do me a favour?”

Steven glanced behind him a moment, half-expecting some other, more responsible and distinguished Steven to step up to the job.

“Um, me?”

Priyanka nodded. “The thing is, Connie has been down with a cold since yesterday. She's been running a fever, and I wouldn't want to leave her alone if it gets any worse…”

Steven stopped listening as the news washed over him. If Connie was sick, maybe she wasn't avoiding him after all? Maybe this was all some big misunderstanding that they could laugh about later when she was feeling well enough for a sense of humour.

“...And on top of that, Doug won't be home until six, and the hospital left it so late to call me I haven't had a chance to call for a sitter yet,” Priyanka continued. “Would you be able to stay with her while I'm gone? There are carrot sticks and juice in the fridge for if you're hungry, and I'll have Connie write you a thank you note when she's feeling well enough-”

“Yes!” Steven interrupted eagerly. “I'd love to! I'll look after her!”

“She's taken medicine and she has plenty of water, but the emergency numbers are on the fridge if she starts feeling worse,” Priyanka finished, grabbing her purse and slipping on some shoes. “Maybe the two of you could even watch some television if she's awake.”

Steven nodded, smile widening. As Priyanka opened the door to leave, she looked back at him.

“Thank you again, Steven. You're a good boy.”

Steven's heart swelled with something familial and he waved goodbye as she shut the door behind her.

Well then. Time to check on Connie.

Steven wasted no time in rushing up the stairs, but skidded to a halt outside of Connie's door, taking care to knock. He waited for several seconds, knocking again when there was no answer. After another pause of silence, he cautiously turned the handle. As he pushed open the door, Steven's eyes fell on the shape of Connie huddled up in bed. Her cheeks were flushed, and a cool cloth had been placed on her forehead to try and ward off the fever.

“Connie?” Steven whispered. She grumbled something, eyes fluttering a little, but she seemed in a state of delirium that divided her from the land of the living and conscious. Taking a seat beside her, Steven tried again. “How are you feeling?”

Connie mumbled again, still too out of it to give him a proper answer, but this time at least she was using the English language to convey her sick reality.

“Bright… butterflies…”

“Wow, you're really in another world right now, huh?” Steven remarked. “But that's okay! I'm not going anywhere. In fact, uhh, I'll read to you! That's what Dad always does when I'm sick!”

He reached over to pick up a copy of the third instalment of the Spirit Morph Saga sitting on her bedside table, opening it to her latest bookmark.

“Okay, er, you were on chapter nineteen? All righty.”

Steven cleared his throat.

“ _ 'Lisa could hardly believe her eyes. Archemicarus, who'd always been by her side, now felt unrecognisable to her. He watched her with the cool indifference of a traitor. “How could this happen?” she cried. “We're like two sides of the same coin. How could you do this, knowing you would hurt me?” The volcano had never felt as cold as it did when her spirit companion spoke next. “It was written in the stars. Neither of us would have realised how powerful we are without some kind of catalyst.” Lisa stared in dismay as she realised the harsh reality of the situation: Archimicarus had always been doing what he thought was best for her, even if it meant becoming the villain she despised so.' _ ”

 

…

 

Steven opened his eyes.

As he stood up, he realised he was no longer in the Maheswaran residence. Instead, he was in some sort of dimly lit cavern, stretching on as far as he could see.

“Wh… I'm not… huh?”

It took a few moments of the darkness washing over him for the panic to set in.

“What?! Connie?! Connie, are you there?!”

Nothing. He pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Way to go, Steven. Here you are, just a simple goal in mind, talk to Connie, and you can't even do that…”

While this could definitely be the result of some kind of gem artefact hurtling his body into a faraway cave in the bowels of Europe or something, he was more inclined to believe it was a dream of some kind, and that he'd fallen asleep thinking about the cave Lisa and Archimicarus had been dwelling in while he'd been reading to Connie.

Come to think of it, Connie was dreaming too. Maybe this was his dream power at work again, a more drastic attempt to reach out to her?

“Crafty, Steven,” he internally complimented with a pleased nod. “Very crafty.”

At that moment, he heard a shout, and the clashing of a sword, the noise bringing Connie's face to his mind instinctively. Without a second thought he set off running in the direction he hoped the noise had come from. The cave felt almost real, its detailed textures, sights, and sounds immaculate, and he found himself distracted by the realism of it all. Compared to the relatively abstract dream plains of Kiki's mind, he felt a rush of pride and fondness towards the vividness of Connie's imagination.

Suddenly, his vision was obscured by some kind of foreign pink matter being flung into him, sending him stumbling backwards against the cave wall. He let out a yelp of surprise, expecting some kind of pain to follow suit, only to come away unscathed.

Huh. Definitely a dream, then. And a true testament to how bizarre his reality was.

The pink substance wisped away into nothingness and as it cleared he finally laid his eyes on who he was looking for. With a yell, Connie brought her sword down on some kind of cotton candy beast, a cloud-like being that hissed as it lunged at her repeatedly, despite having lost an arm with her latest attack.

“Connie!” he called, racing over to her. Connie's head jerked up in surprise.

“Steven?”

The moment of disbelief was all it took for her opponent to throw her off balance, sending her to the ground with a loud thud.

Instinctively Steven withdrew his shield and hurled it at the creature, lodging it in its torso. With another hiss, the creature exploded, cloudy substances billowing out and once again fading into nothing.

“Steven, what are you doing here?” Connie asked, a vision of pure confusion, as he retrieved his shield from where the cloud being had once been. He examined it, but it was as though the being has stopped existing entirely after the damage was dealt.

“I came to talk to you,” he began, but just as quickly as their conversation began, it was interrupted by a howling just to Steven's right. He was bowled out of the way by yet another monster, that lunged for Connie with a shriek. She reached for her sword and rolled out of the way, sending the creature crashing into the wall, fading away. As she gripped the handle tightly, glancing around in anticipation of the next attack, Steven's brow furrowed.

“That isn't Mom's sword,” he uttered in confusion. Connie glanced over at it. The sword was a deep grey, with an unspecified red gemstone embedded in the pommel.

“Well, duh, Steven. It's Lisa's iron sword,” Connie said flatly, before stabbing a pink cloud creature through. It dissipated instantly, and Steven winced.

“Oh, you're... Lisa? Is this what this is? We're in the volcano from book 3?”

“Apparently,” she grunted distantly. She dodged an incoming blow, skirting around the side of yet another mysterious pink creature and slicing their form cleanly in half. “Makes me wonder why  _ you're  _ here though. Are you a figment of my fever dreaming or are you astral projecting into my subconscious?”

“Er... the second one. Sorry, I'm watching you while your mom's gone.”

Connie pinched the bridge of her nose. “Geez… Okay. Well, keep up. These creatures are ruthless, and they just keep coming.”

“We should form Stevonnie!” Steven suggested immediately. “I bet they could scare the bad guys away!”

“No!” Connie said sharply. She decapitated another cloud monster and took a deep breath. “I mean... this is a dream, so obviously we can't really fuse.”

Steven was a little taken aback by the reaction.

“Right. Okay, that makes sense... it was only a suggestion, Connie.”

“Well, it won't work. So summon your shield already and help me out.”

Taken aback by her coldness, Steven relented. Bringing out his shield, Steven followed Connie as she crept further into the darkness of the cavern. He couldn't shake the feeling that she was…  _ mad  _ at him, somehow.

Steven wasn't about to confirm this fear of his, however.

“What are those things?” He asked instead.

“I don't know. But they keep finding me. It's best if we just… keep moving.”

She was visibly on edge, gripping the sword tight enough for her knuckles to bulge, glancing in all directions to keep an eye out for any incoming monsters.

“How long have you been fighting them?” He continued, trying to keep pace with her as she briskly picked her way through the cave, keeping close to the walls.

“Realistically, ever since I fell asleep,” she answered somewhat flatly, not even turning back to face him. “But it feels like hours now. Every time I defeat one, another shows up. They never get weaker or stronger, they're just… there.”

Steven skimmed his memories of his singular reading of the Unfamiliar Familiar books, in the hopes that this was some kind of reference he could use to solve the equation of why exactly these giant sentient clouds were picking a fight with them. But nothing rang a bell, even though it felt  _ familiar  _ somehow.

“You were saying something before I fell asleep,” Steven recalled. “I mean, you were really out of it, but still… it wasn't anything to do with fighting giant cloud people, though. It was… butterflies?”

Connie tensed up, and suddenly ducked, just in time for a pink fist to slam against the place in the wall she had been standing against just a moment ago. He reached for his shield, slamming the creature upside the head with it, and the momentary confusion allowed Connie to thrust her sword through its chest, defeating it instantly. As the being once again faded away, he caught Connie's look of panic as she quickly turned away, quickening her pace.

“Connie, are you seeing butterflies?” Steven asked urgently, speeding up to try and close the widening gap she was creating. “Is that why you're being attacked? Is, is this something psychological? Cause playing dream doctor is like, my forte at this point!”

“This is nothing to do with - Steven, we have an objective and there's no time to dwell on the how or the why of it!”

“But you love that!” Steven protested, more puzzled than ever. “Connie, you're acting like you don't even care why all of this is happening!”

“Because it doesn't matter!” She snapped. “Steven, if we can just get to where we need to be-”

“Well what is it? What's the goal here? What are we here to do, Connie, can you at least answer me that?!”

Connie stopped in her tracks, turning slowly to meet his eyes. Her face twisted in confusion.

“We… you see, the… the mission is to…”

With a shuddering breath, she gripped a handful of her hair.

“I… I don't know. Just to, to keep moving forward? If I keep going, and being strong, eventually they'll stop coming and it'll all be fine, and things will go back to normal.”

“But you can't keep running, can't you see that?” Steven pleaded. Another creature lunged at them and Steven skidded in between, barely blocking the attack in time. “Connie, they're not stopping! They aren't slowing down and fighting isn't working, so you need to try something else!”

With a bellow, the monster lurched at them again, and the shield creaked ominously under the strain.

“Like what?!”

“Just - just talk to me!”

Steven shoved the creature with a grunt, and an ominous rumbling began to shudder through them like aftershocks as the cloud began to take form, rising up, up-

Realisation hit like a train.

“That's Pink Diamond,” he whispered.

Connie recoiled, gripping her sword tightly, but made no movements. Pink Diamond mirrored her, standing there silently, watching her.

“Connie,” Steven said quietly, “are you scared of what I told you about my mom being Pink Diamond?”

Connie grew still.

“No,” she answered. “No, of course not.”

“So then why are you dreaming about her?”

No answer.

Frustrated, Steven lunged forward, gripping Connie's shoulders, desperate for her to just  _ look at him. _

“Are you scared of me too? Now that you know that she - that  _ I'm  _ Pink Diamond? Is that why you haven't been talking to me?”

“Of course not, Steven!”

“So what is it then?! Tell me!”

“I… Steven, it's so much to process! The gems are falling apart over it and I  _ know  _ you're trying to fix everything by yourself, so why would I tell you how I feel about it? You… you have enough to deal with.”

Steven stopped, allowing his arms to fall to his sides. “I, uh. I just wanted to know you were okay…”

“Well now you know I'm  _ not _ okay.”

Connie looked away, cheeks burning, mouth pulled into a grim line. Steven took a step forward.

“Connie, do you hate me now?” He hated the note of desperation in his voice. She tensed up, reaching out to take his hand.

“No! Steven, why would I hate you?”

“You're right, it's just, it's  _ weird  _ and I get why you don't know how to feel. I don't either.”

Squeezing his hand, Connie met his gaze, eyes fiery.

“Steven, none of this is your fault! I… I didn't want to make you upset by talking about this, and with everything happening with Garnet, I figured you had enough going on without worrying about me.”

“But Connie, we made a deal that we were gonna face everything together from now on,” Steven said firmly. He turned to stare up at Pink Diamond, watching them with big, unblinking eyes. “This is a really weird time and you’re my best friend. Please don't shut me out.”

Connie nodded slowly.

From up above, Pink Diamond gave them both a smile before dissipating.

“I came to visit you,” Steven ventured. “You haven't been answering my calls or texts, and I didn't want it to get out of hand like last time – I mean, I'd prefer not to get Kevin involved in our business this time.” He laughed a little, hoping she would join in, but she continued to watch him, unusually stoic.

“Sorry,” she said lamely. “I didn't mean to avoid you or anything, it's just… it's a lot.”

“Tell me about it? Please?”

She shrugged.

“Well, it's a big deal. This whole Pink Diamond thing. I mean, I knew Rose even less than you did, so I can't pretend like I really understand the weight of it all, but... the Diamonds are bad, right? Even if Pink Diamond wasn't as bad as the rest of them, she... she lied about everything, and she  _ owned  _ Pearl! Aren't you upset about that?”

Steven shrugged helplessly.

“It's complicated. Even Pearl says so, and she lived through it, so...”

Connie yelled out in frustration, throwing down Lisa's sword.

“I mean - it's ridiculous! How -  _ why-” _

“I'm sure we'll find out the rest of it soon,” Steven chuckled sheepishly.

Connie sighed deeply, running her hands through her hair.

“I have no idea how  _ you  _ can be so chipper about all of this.”

“It's a leo thing.”

She cracked a wry smile.

“Definitely not because nothing about the gems surprises you anymore.”

“Of course not.”

Connie sighed again, squaring her shoulders.

“Okay. I think… I'm on my way to making my peace with it. You?”

Steven grinned at her. “I barely even think about it! I'm planning a wedding now!”

“Wait, hold on, a wedding?!”

“Well, I'll have to tell you the whole story…”

 

…

 

Steven blinked sleepily. It was beginning to get dark outside, and as he wiped a trace of drool away from his chin, he saw Connie watching him. Automatically he reached out to feel her brow.

“Your fever's broken,” he uttered in disbelief.

“You really are a mind doctor,” Connie remarked, propping herself upright. “I think you used psychology to cure my immune system.”

“Heh, just one of my many talents.”

They both dissolved into laughter, and Steven scooped her into a hug. Connie wound her arms around him tightly in return, burying her face in his shoulder.

“I'm sorry,” she mumbled, muffled against his shirt. “I was being stupid.”

“You're  _ not  _ stupid,” Steven rebuffed immediately, pulling back to give her a disapproving look. “But we're doing things the right way from now on, okay? So the next time something earth-shattering happens, text me back please?”

She giggled, nodding through her laughter.

“I promise. And it's a jam bud promise.”

Steven smiled, pulling her into another half hug.

“Jam buds.”

“...So, since you're sticking around until Dad gets home… want to watch Under The Knife and not think about all of the horrible things the future probably holds?”

“You know what, Connie? Nothing would make me happier.”

**Author's Note:**

> Just like last year, I reinforce that connverse is not my strong suit. But I had fun with this! Let me know what you think? <3


End file.
